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Be kind. Encourage compassion. Inspire creativity. Nurture courage. Grow your mind.

How to Teach Empathy to Kids: Curiosity-First

May 15, 2026

Teaching empathy to children is one of the most powerful things adults can do to build inclusive, compassionate communities. Research shows empathy skills begin developing as early as age 3 and with the right activities, parents and educators can nurture this superpower intentionally. One of the simplest and most effective ways to build empathy in kids is through play-based perspective-taking, like the "What I Think I Know vs. What I Learned" guessing game.

What Is Empathy, and Why Does It Matter for Young Children?

Empathy is the ability to recognize and share the feelings of another person, to walk in their shoes and see the world through their eyes. For children ages 3-10, developing empathy lays the foundation for:

- Making and keeping friendships
- Navigating conflict with kindness
- Appreciating differences in others
- Building inclusive, belonging-centered communities

Raising my son Guion, who also happens to have Down syndrome, I've witnessed firsthand how empathy transforms the way children relate to one another. When kids learn to look past first impressions and get genuinely curious about others, something remarkable happens: they stop seeing differences as barriers and start seeing them as what makes the world interesting.

Why Play Is the Best Way to Teach Empathy?

Young children learn best when they're playing. Play-based empathy activities work because they:

- Lower a child's defensive barriers (it's a game, not a lesson)
- Create natural moments of surprise and discovery
- Give children language and practice for perspective-taking before they need it in real situations

This is the heart of the Curious B.E.I.N.G.s approach: curiosity first, judgment never.

The Empathy Superpower Activity: "What I Think I Know vs. What I Learned"

Ready to unlock the superpower of empathy in your child? This simple three-step game is designed for ages 5 and up and works equally well at home, in the classroom, or at family gatherings. All you need is a printed question card and a willing partner.

How to Play: 

  1. Prepare for the Adventure: Download and print the game for all participants here
  2. Guessing Game: Pick someone you don’t know well and guess their answers to the questions.
  3. The Interview: Now ask your person the same questions. Listen carefully. Write down what you actually hear and learn.  
  4. Reflect and Discover: Compare your guesses to their actual answers. Where were you right? Where were you surprised?

What Children Discover

The magic of this activity is in the gap between guesses and reality. Almost every child who plays this game is surprised — and that surprise is the empathy lesson. The activity shows, in a concrete and memorable way, that:
- Our first impressions and assumptions about people are often incomplete
- People are always more than what meets the eye
- Getting curious about someone is the first step to genuine connection

Tips for Educators: Using this Activity in the Classroom

  • PreK-Kindergarten: Pair children randomly. Keep questions simple and visual (favorite animal, favorite color).
  • Grades 1-3: Use at the start of the year to build classroom community. Debrief as a group: "What surprised you most?"
  • Grades 4-5: Extend the reflection. Ask students to write one sentence about what they learned and how it changes the way they see that person.
    Discussion Questions to Use After the Activity:
    - What did you *think* you knew about your partner that turned out to be different?
    - How did it feel when you guessed wrong?
    - What does this teach us about making assumptions about people we don't know well?
    - How can getting curious about someone help you become their friend?

Why Similarities Bring Us Together and Differences Make Us Stronger

I've always believed that while similarities may draw us toward each other, it's in our differences that we truly grow and learn - it is what makes this world a beautiful and colorful place. When we teach children to be curious about what makes each person unique - rather than be unsettled by it - we give them the building blocks of a genuinely inclusive mindset.

That's the mission of Curious B.E.I.N.G.s: to help every child grow into someone who sees the world and each other with kindness and wonder.

Frequently Asked Questions

Q: At what age can children start learning empathy?

A: Empathy skills being emerging as early as age 2 - 3, when children start to recognize others' emotions. By ages 4 - 6, most children are developmentally ready for simple perspective-taking activities like the one above. Structured play and guided reflection can accelerate and deepen this development throughout elementary school (and at home).

Q: What is the best way to teach empathy to elementary students?

Research and classroom experience point to three key strategies: (1) perspective-taking activities that make other people's inner lives (emotions, feelings) vivid and real, (2) structured reflection after those activities, and (3) stories featuring characters with diverse abilities and backgrounds. The Curious B.E.I.N.G.s program integrates all three across 8 lessons for PreK–5.

Q: How Do I Talk to My Child About Differences and Disabilities?

A: Get curious. Ask your child: what can this person do, and how do they do it? That simple shift — from focusing on what's different to discovering what's possible — is where empathy begins. And it's a lesson that goes both ways: every person, regardless of ability, has something to offer and something to learn. Resources like Cincinnati Children's and ZERO TO THREE recommend letting children's natural curiosity lead — answering their questions openly and honestly rather than shushing them, and keeping the focus on what makes each person whole.

About the Author:

Rebecca Wilson Macsovits is a Colorado mother of three, including her son Guion, who has Down syndrome. She is the founder of Curious B.E.I.N.G.s and author of Guion the Lion. The Curious B.E.I.N.G.s disability-informed, strengths-based SEL program has been implemented in 18 schools across 7 states, reaching 1,800+ students.

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  • Be Kind. 
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  • Nurture Courage. 
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